after the storm, the wind swept me off my feet.

still on this topic….honestly, sometimes I sit on my desk thinking who am I kidding here? you or myself?
honestly, don’t trust me! even I don’t trust me. every time the question appeared, I second question myself for the answer I gave you. But then again, a whisper tells me that it might be you, not just me. it might just be you,bebi
if only you know me better.

I don’t remember signing a lifetime contract on these bitter sweet surprises day to day….geez!

when people starts desire for more and fails to use their own imagination properly, that’s when it turns ugly. the whole fantasy and drama going to drain. such craps they posted on youtube. drama yo drama!!!!!!!!!!!

‘your English is not very good’
can not seems to get over that comment, especially after I re-read my own writing for zillion of times now.
maybe third opinion will help.

still figuring out which word that actually hurt me the most.

I guess when you’re young, the whole reason of life is finding the meaning of being. looking for words of wisdom about every single misery and joy happen around you. trying to find a lead to get out of confusion. being a drama queen. being over excited over nothing. being over depressed on minor accident. was it good those days? I don’t quite remember. I was always cynical and skeptic. not very easy to believe. but never once I felt at lost.

is the secret I was not willing to share, is the story you would not want to listen. is what always got me so lonely.

I could not resist the temptation. although in the end it only make me sad. but I miss him the most. He is in fact already a blurry memory from years ago, like an old picture fades on white and brown tone. But the warm and secure I received from him is still clear to me. when I needed the most, he is the man. save me from misery as I saved him his love the day I was conceived. such a funny fate that lingers between us. I gave him what he wants for exchange of my life. and he gave me the world as exchange of his.
this temptation of take a sneak peek of what might have been was so very strong. despite of the sadness, there is a glimpse of a dream never to be told, never to come true.

what to do when life suddenly takes the unexpected turn? or is there such things as unexpected turn?